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By SAVANNAH CUNNICK

THERE ARE THREE SIGNS OF OLD AGE...THE FIRST IS LOSS OF MEMORY...I FORGOT THE OTHER TWO...

What is OLD AGE you ask? Well in my case, my mind is just beating my body to death. It doesn't understand where it's speedy little partner has gone.
It's not that my body and energy level is shot.....it's just slowed down a little. I guess we have to realize that we are just in another phase of life and if putting on the brakes a little bit on the physical end of things is what we have to do...then do it!

Do you find that you are maybe sitting down more?

Giving that kitty cat or puppy dog finally a chance to bond with you and sit in your lap? Reading a little more? Watching more informative television versus fantasy land entertainment? Taking time for family, friends and those grandchildren who worship you? Dwelling more on happy memories and positive thoughts versus stress and depression?

Hey, what's wrong with that? It's simply the next phase of life that we must willingly adjust to.

Be happy you are still here. Waking up each morning and say: I'm grateful to be alive. Once again, more mind over matter. Stay positive and listen to me when I say: Do not lose your sense of humor. Smile. Laugh. Do a little dance; who cares if someone is watching!

You will feel healthier and happier and those are number one suggestions to a fine and fitting OLD AGE LIFE. You are needed more than you think. For those we know who can't quite get it together with this old age thing, for Pete's sake, lend them a hand and put them on the happy track.

Consider this the best time of your life. Most of us have been married, then raised your children and now have grandchildren. We have worked jobs and now retired with the social security and some also with pensions.

We have paid countless bills in the past and put food on the table day after day after day.

We have been football coaches, girl scout leaders, room mothers, team parents, car pooling to dance class, music class, sports events, band practice.
The list goes on and on what we of OLD AGE have done in our past stages of life. Well, take a big sigh of relief we DID it and now we SLOW DOWN a little bit. Plus, we have memories that the younger age stagers are still creating. How often do you ask yourselves: HOW DID I DO ALL THAT? What a treadmill I was on. See, that's what I mean, you OLD AGERS let your mind just go ahead and be as busy as it wants to and let your physical being finally relax and enjoy each day as it comes.

I have interviewed several folks who are members of the OLD AGE CLUB and here are some of their humorous comments.
Well, when I was younger, ALL I wanted was a nice BMW. Now, I don't care about the W.

I'm RETIRED. I was tired yesterday and I'm tired again today.

You know why we OLD men wear our pants so high? You'll find out.

I'm in the INITIAL stages of my golden years: SS, IRA's, AARP and so forth.
I have found that with age comes wisdom and discounts.

My motto in life is now: Goobye Tension ..... Hello Pension.
Hey, it's nice to be here. At my age, it's nice to be ANYWHERE!

Well, that snap crackle pop in the morning ain't my dad gum Rice Krispies!

Uncle Festus says: You know you're getting old when you throw a wild party and the neighbors don't even realize it.

Aunt Martha states: Sometimes I wake up grumpy and some days I let him sleep.

Uncle Clyde told me: Quit worrying about your health, it'll go away. And by the way, be nice to your children. They will choose your nursing home.

Auntie Ann says that: The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly and lie about your age.


Cousin Clara wrote me and said: I MUST be getting older, all the names in my personal phone book end in M.D.
And so the list goes on. Keeping your sense of humor is half the battle. We're all in it together! When someone asks me if you could be 21 again, would you have done anything any different? No, not really...otherwise I would have never learned along the way what I know now. Not to worry, after all, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. Once you figure that out....put it to good use, my friends!

*****

Back to the Short Mountain Trading Post. We are now closed until mid March - weather permitting. We are already planning our first FLEA MARKET event and taking reservations for FREE spaces to sell your antiques, housewares, home décor, tools, baked goods and so forth. Just call me to put your name on the list at 615- 464-7824. Now is the time to get your items together and be ready to go!!

*****

The Feed America First Program is still going strong. Please feel free to come and collect food goods, clothing and house goods if you are in need of them. This activity is on every Saturday from 7 to 9 in Woodbury by the Baseball Park. For further information call me at the number above.
Sue Stancil and her group are still staying very busy with the Cannon County Animal Shelter Program. They constantly need pet supply donations and comfy things for the animals who are temporarily housed with the very generous volunteers who have taken them in. Once again, please call the number above and I will direct your call to Sue. Please try to help these folks and little animals who have been abandoned and left out in the cold. Thanks so much.

*****

Well, we actually got a little bit of real SNOW today. Just a light dusting, but so beautiful . Hey, all you OLD TIMERS...stick your head out that door and take a deep breath of cold fresh air. Whooo-Whee that will start the wheels aturnin' again!
Gotta run for now, Folks. I hope you enjoyed this week's column and it brought you a chuckle or two. Remember to keep up the good work, love your family, help your neighbors, drive safely and buckle up....laugh, smile and do a little dance just for the heck of it.

HUGS, SAVANNAH

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